| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
 England
3260 Posts |
 Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 3:47:15 PM
|
|
WARNING WARNING - Do not tune into Radio 2 this afternoon - Anthea Turner is on there promoting her new book, How to be the perfect Housewife (or something similar). Who let her out of Room 101 ?
|
 photo by Eric G Jones |
|
Report to moderator
|
|
|
baxter
Gold Member
England
1123 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 3:54:59 PM
|
Think the Anthea police need notifying..... and i'd definitely complain to the manufacturers of the Anthea restraints and Anthea gobstopper..... I'd also make an official complaint to Room 101 and lack of security on the door.....
And i'd warn ummmm the WORLD.... she's out.... |
Report to Moderator  |
|
|
Kirsty5278
Platinum Member
England
2682 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 4:23:05 PM
|
| how to be the perfect housewife!!!! OMG!!!! are we back in the 1940's!!!!! |
       |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
England
3260 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 4:27:58 PM
|
| If she gets her way we will be - can someone please wake up Room 101 Security and get them to get their tails round to the BBC and drag her back in before it's too late. |
photo by Eric G Jones |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
England
3260 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 4:28:49 PM
|
| Noooooooooooooo, it's too late, she's on there now. Backing away in fear and sticking fingers in ears (la la la I can't hear) |
photo by Eric G Jones |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
polly
Platinum Member
2183 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 4:49:58 PM
|
I turned on the radio by mistake  ........have been laying down in a darkened room ever since....breathing into a paper bag....its not right...I mean...ITS NOT NORMAL...she must be stopped...I blame the government....one minuite we are all happily sleeping on squashed pillows, next thing you know you are eyeing up plastic boxes and imagining your shoes all safely stored in them....( not me its just what I have heard.)....they say that a lady in our village now has different wicker baskets for cotton wool/tissues etc in her bathroom.Poor cow...and you know she still looks normal..... |
   
Photos1and2EricGJones
pollywells@.live.co.uk |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Judith S
Platinum Member
Wales
15686 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 4:52:08 PM
|
| Ah - is that who I can hear wittering away.......... |
    |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Kirsty5278
Platinum Member
England
2682 Posts |
|
|
rosyw
Platinum Member
England
3756 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 5:45:08 PM
|
I've found the perfect antidote for anyone who accidentally heard this dreadful person! it's a book I got years ago, it's called "The I hate to do Housework Book"  full of very handy tips on how to get away with doing as little as possible
Polly, I hope you soon feel better try some visualizations - you know - washing up piled up in the sink, dirty washing on the floor etc., this should help |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Pixie
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
6586 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 5:50:20 PM
|
Is there anyone in the world who is not directly related to the Woman (can't even bear to type her name) who actually likes her?
Anyone? |
  |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
georgiauk
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
2605 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 6:07:48 PM
|
Phew, Thankfully missed it but for those poor souls that happened across it here's a few snippets from my housekeeping book
"A Little Book of House Messing" by Anna Crosbie, suitably under titled "Feng S-h-i-t-e"
The 3-Step Rubbish Plan
1, Buy bin liners that are a fraction too small for your bin.
2, Rather than empty the bin squash down the contents so more will fit in.
3, Keep squashing down until it is affirmed that the bag will split when you lift it out.
Creating Balance in Your Life
Use the top of the wardrobe to build a structurally challenged pile of things you might one day either throw away or store in the loft.
Quite Simply
Life is too short to clean under rugs or large appliances.
  |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Pixie
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
6586 Posts |
|
|
Kirsty5278
Platinum Member
England
2682 Posts |
|
|
alix liddle
Silver Member
England
421 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 6:54:07 PM
|
| Yeah. We could upload photos of who has the messiest house. Spotless horse, ****hole house. |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Arabian Girl
Platinum Member
England
2893 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 7:28:16 PM
|
I hate Anthea Turner that perfect housewife thing makes me want to vomit...she did after all steal someones husbandidiot womanshe was on philip an fern the other morning doing something eqaully annoyinghate that woman |
   
Posting from Billinge Wigan |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
templars
Platinum Member
England
1852 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 8:05:27 PM
|
Anthea = Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives Stepford wives - oh forgot to say Stepford wives + adultery + tackiness!!!
Yuk!!!! |
   www.eviepeel.com    |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
vjc
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
4952 Posts |
Posted - 29 Apr 2008 : 8:37:07 PM
|
| All i`m going to say is......Arrrgh! lets all head for cover from the cr*p! |
        |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
dinkidoo
Gold Member
United Kingdom
652 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 10:46:16 AM
|
Now im ducking as i type this but i used to watch Perfect Housewife regularly
Im not tidy (Claire Honeyb will verify this as she has had to wash my dishes on numerous occasions just to find a clean cup to have a coffee with) but i found it quite entertaining to watch other people clean and did once attempt to fold my towels in the 'Anthea' way but gave up as it was too tricky and chucked them in the cupboard as it was easier!
It used to motivate me for all of 5 seconds to be a better housewife! Thing is its hardwork keeping our house tidy as well as looking after the kids and horses but i see it as my job and enjoy it especially when i do get it all nice and clean and organised (which is rare im afraid)Afterall my husband works 12 hour days and on top of that has 2 hours travelling as well so least i can do is try and keep on top of it all
Wouldn't go as far as reading her book though but next time i notice a new series....... |
    |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
England
3260 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 10:51:56 AM
|
Dinkidoo, methinks you are on a downward spiral to housework hell.
However, it's not too late. Get down to your nearest NHS Direct and explain your problem. They have a list of psychiatrists who can help you |
photo by Eric G Jones |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
dinkidoo
Gold Member
United Kingdom
652 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 11:18:45 AM
|
| No you see they wouldn't treat me as its all in my head. I don't actually practice what i see i just think about it alot and picture it then sit down Ideally i would like to be the perfect housewife but in reality im more of a candidate for Kim and Aggy!! |
|
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
England
3260 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 11:46:30 AM
|
| Phew, that was a close call. As long as it's all in your mind, that's fine, just don't go putting it into practice. Now that is the road to rack and ruin |
photo by Eric G Jones |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Gerri
Platinum Member
England
4211 Posts |
|
|
Roseanne
Moderator
United Kingdom
6708 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 2:26:48 PM
|
| I couldn't care less about Anthea (and s0d housework...) but she did have a most beautiful Andalusian stallion!! |
Roseanne |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
England
3260 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 2:36:08 PM
|
| Poor horse, bet it was spotlessly clean at all times, hoovered up the yard after itself and could probably form a floral display from some haylage, straw and lickits. |
photo by Eric G Jones |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Gerri
Platinum Member
England
4211 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 2:51:42 PM
|
| hee hee Merlot, but I bet shes a real skunk in real life and she is just made to look like a stepford wife by her pr people |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Merlot
Platinum Member
England
3260 Posts |
Posted - 30 Apr 2008 : 3:31:56 PM
|
What, you mean like she trolls around in her Tesco tracky bottoms, T-shirt covered in chip pan fat splashes, fag on, ponytail in a scrunchie and a pair of flip flops.............now I might have a bit of respect in that case.
No, actually, she'd still be hideously smiley and twee. She even beats Ann Diamond in the twee stakes. Even when she tries to be "funny", it's so contrived you just want to throw her off a bridge. |
photo by Eric G Jones |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Topic |
|
Topic Locked 
but I cannot bear Anthea Turner