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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 7:46:09 PM
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So my dad cleared out my yard and all of Mouse's things. Left over feed is going to a reascue place, rugs are going to be washed, but what do i do with the saddle? It's really old and rubbish and no good for anything, should i just throw it away or is there sombody who will recycle them?
Here's a list of what i have: Saddle Boots Rugs Stable rugs Bridle Bits I have no idea what to do with any of it. I feel horrible keeping it for another horse.
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Danger Mouse |
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Vera
Membership Moderator
United Kingdom
8652 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 7:53:33 PM
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Why now donate it to a horse sanctuary?
Or sell it and give the money to a horse sanctuary? |
Hampshire |
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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
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Honeyb060674
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
4301 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 7:56:52 PM
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Don't be too hasty getting rid of things Meggie Lu, it's still very early on. I kept alot of Honey's things as I simply couldn't bear to part with them, as it happens when Sunny came along he's a shorty too & he still wears one of her turnouts (funnily enough it's the only one he hasn't customised ) You don't know what's or who may be round the corner for you, so take your time. On the other hand if you feel you really do want to get rid of them, I know that our local HAPPA stables sell 2nd hand stuff, maybe there's a rescue centre near you that could put them to good use? |
Claire & Sunny x http://sunnyandclaire.blogspot.com/ |
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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:06:00 PM
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Yer i no what your saying Claire. Im just not coping very well, i dnt no what to do with myself. Feel really lost :-( |
Danger Mouse |
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Callisto
Platinum Member
6905 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:22:45 PM
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Meggie-lu, don't do anything too quickly. When you feel you can face it then clean all his gear and sort it out neatly. Get his rugs cleaned and pack them away. Then when everything is not so raw you can decide what to d with it. I still have various things from horses that I have lost over the years, and in a strange way it brings them back when you remember them wearing them, and once the rawness of loss has gone, that can be really nice. Keep the things until you have another horse to use them on, then you can decide what to keep, what doesn't fit etc. etc., and decide what to do with them all. None of them cost you anything to keep, but if you unexpectedly found a new horse, then it would cost a lot to replace them all.
Chin up, it will get better |
Zahkira (GR Amaretto x Taffetta) Linda East Sussex |
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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:37:43 PM
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It's bloody horrible! Hate this feeling, maybe i shuldn't get another one. |
Danger Mouse |
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complete novice
Gold Member
831 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:50:38 PM
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Maybe you should, maybe you shouldn't but it's far too early to decide either way. If Mouse had been ill before hand you would have been a little better prepared but it was very sudden and the shock sometimes takes a while. Put all your stuff away for now, even if you decide you don't want another horse there will be someone in the future that you would like to see put the things to good use but it's far too soon at the moment. I know Mouse can never be replaced but he gave you such a lot of confidence, it would be nice to think that your confidence could be used in the future to help a horse who needs it. |
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garnet
Platinum Member
2382 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:51:04 PM
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Still very early days; of course you feel bloody horrible at the moment but don't rush into anything yet. I am still using things bought in 1986 for our first horse and as Callisto says it can bring back memories in a nice way. Don't try to push yourself to do anything just because you feel you have to or ought to. You will know when the time is right for another horse, and I am sure that time will come for you because you loved Mouse so much. |
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moatside
Platinum Member
England
3224 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:52:39 PM
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Meggie-Lu, take time to grieve. Loosing your best friend is hard - even more so when it is so unexpected.
Pack his stuff away until you feel more like sorting it out - do not act in haste.
Most of on here have been where you are now, the pain never goes away but in time you will remember the good times.
You will know when the time is right - be kind to yourself xx |
www.spanglefish.com/kasanarhythmbeads/ |
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Quarabian
Platinum Member
Wales
4340 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 8:57:13 PM
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YOU REALLY SHOULD GET ANOTHER ONE!!!!
But don't be in a hurry either to get a horse or to get rid of Mouses' things. You never know what you might need and it will cost a fortune to replace. What sort of horse are you looking for next time? What do you want to do with him or her.? This is a really good time to buy once you are sure, but I repeat, don't rush yourself or allow yourself to be rushed.
Another practical thing, have you spoken to the yard owner? If you are likely to find another then you don't want to lose your space at the yard. They may be open to wait before looking for another livery. |
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sab2
Platinum Member
8467 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:07:22 PM
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Meggie lu i agree with the above please don,t do anything too soon, we have all lost one and i think at the time we feel lost , but in time i think you may regret passing on his things, you never know there may be one just round the corner that you will fall in love with, wash his jim jams etc and pop them away for now, they mat come in handy one day. I lost my darling homebred yearling a few years ago and i still cannot bear to put her headcollar or rug on anybody but i also cannot bear to part with them, one day i am sure i will use them again. Sending you some huge big in time it dose get better. |
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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:11:07 PM
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These are really good points guys. I am giving up my yard, it's to far out of the way especially now i am selling my motorbike, there is also nobody to ride with this was ok for Mouse as he preferred going out on his own. I would like to be with people i can ride with, as much as i hate livery yards, there are some nice ones near my house. I have been thinking about what i would like to get, i no u all love your arabs, however im not ready for such a clever breed. I have been thinking a 15.1-16.1 cob. But i wouldn't rule a youngster out, especially if one really spoke to me. But maybe i will think about this after my driving test. |
Danger Mouse |
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hazelcat74
Silver Member
472 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:27:42 PM
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I agree please dont be too hasty in getting rid of things, it is very early days. When my mare died in 1996 I couldnt even see a field with horses in without crying but in time it will get less painful. I still have Kizzy's bridle and saddle, and NZ rug even still has her hairs on it, they are bagged up in my loft will probably never be used again but I am glad I still have them. Sometimes when things are so painful we make hasty decisions which we may regret later. One day when the time is right I am sure you will find another special friend and Mouse will always be in your heart xx
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Nichole Waller
Gold Member
England
1168 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:30:14 PM
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Hi Meg, I know you are really hurting at the moment but it will get better, I promise.
Just do as the others have said and put all his stuff away for now.
I lost my first horse in horrid circumstances and I was really upset about it. It did help that I already had Africa as she took my mind off it a bit. I kept all of Aaron's stuff and I now use it on Ozzy as they are the same size.
Horses are so expensive to keep that if you do decide to get another one you could use Mouses stuff again (if it fits..!)
I think it's a good idea to pass your driving test first and get yourself a little run around car. This way you can get to your new yard (wherever it may be) independently.
Winter is always a tough time to have horses so maybe if you feel like it have a look for another one in the spring.
Love to you and mum xxxx |
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Esther
Gold Member
United Kingdom
866 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:49:06 PM
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FWIW I couldn't stay at the yard where Mrs P died. And I've still got her saddle in the cupboard, 18 years later. Much as losing her was very premature and hurt like my very soul had been ripped out, my life was much richer for knowing her. If it hadn't been for her, I wouldn't have had H, and if I hadn't had H then I wouldn't have discovered endurance, and if I hadn't discovered endurance then I wouldn't have met my OH, and if I hadn't met my OH I would never have met Spud, or joined Saddle-Up, and if I hadn't joined Saddle-Up I wouldn't have met Wolf's breeder, and if I hadn't taken on Wolf (and known Spud) then I would never have taken the plunge with Felix.... So you can see, her story still carries on and I am forever grateful for what she started.
Another horse will find you. It may not be the one you expect, and it may not be when you expect, but it will find you. |
paranoid horsemother Photo on far right thanks to West End Photography
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MinHe
Platinum Member
England
2927 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:50:18 PM
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And if you're thinking of getting a youngster, don't get rid of the old saddle, it might come in useful for backing a youngster later on!
Keren |
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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
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Kes
Platinum Member
England
1819 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 9:50:47 PM
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I don't know if this will help but I was in your position 10 months ago. I did keep all the stuff I had amassed from the horse I lost. She was 14.3hh, same as Kes. My saddle doesn't fit Kes but all my rugs do. I had them all professionally cleaned and I look at it as eco-friendly recycling :) The one thing I did donate after she was pts was £150 worth of Prascend Pergolide, to Redwings Sanctuary. A few weeks later I got a lovely personal letter from Redwings talking of Harley's legacy to help others, of course it made me cry all over again but I have kept the letter along with her memory, and a collection of about 30 rugs! The one thing I won't part with though is her bridle. Carole. |
Carole & Kes, West Sussex. |
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Vik1
Platinum Member
1711 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 10:07:29 PM
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Aw jeeze Im almost in tears reading this. I still hurt when I look at Montys things 6 years on now. I do agree, you need to allow yourself time to grieve. It took me 3 years before I could sell Montys rugs and tack. I wish I kept his saddle now, cos it might fit storm but at the time I wasnt planning on buying a youngster. Ive still got his bit and a couple of his rugs, including his show rug. I still pick it up now and then and give it a good hug. It hurts to look at Mouse's things just now but one day youl look at them with fond memories. |
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Meggie-Lu
Platinum Member
England
1519 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 10:12:48 PM
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Carole thats lovely :-) I no Mouse would like to help other horses after all he was a reasuce himself. His rugs are all pretty new with a wash they would be great for somebody else. As would his boots. Recycling! Love it. I will have a good sort out and see what i have left. |
Danger Mouse |
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Honeyb060674
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
4301 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 10:19:04 PM
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Aww Meggie Lu..lots of hugs As everyone has said it will feel awful for quite sometime, but it does get better. I've never felt pain like it as I did when Honey died, and didn't think I could possibly cope without her or find another special friend. I couldn't stay away from the horses though & turned into a bit of a lurker at the yard. YO kept my stable free for me & it took weeks for me to even be able to clear her bed out, I just used to sit in there with the door closed. But clever YO obviously knew me better than I thought, as along came Sunny, the rest is history & wonderful happy memories. You'll get there in your own time & while you do we're all here for you xxx |
Claire & Sunny x http://sunnyandclaire.blogspot.com/ |
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TAE
Bronze Member
232 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jan 2012 : 11:02:06 PM
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I agree with everyone else, don't get rid of anything yet.
Fate seems to have a strange way of taking over when it comes to horses, and you sound like someone who is just meant to be with them. I wouldn't be at all surprised if within the next year a wonderful horse finds you.
An amazing series of coincidences lead me too my boy and he is turning into an absolute dream horse. It was by no means an easy ride as it included loosing my old mare, who had been with me 22 years and then loosing my nan as well just over 2 weeks later. An emotional year ended with me gaining a 7 month colt just before Xmass, thanks to a small inheritance from my nan and things have gradually been getting better and better ever since.
It will hurt for some time yet, but the good memories get stronger as the bad become less painful. Keep strong. |
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Kes
Platinum Member
England
1819 Posts |
Posted - 31 Jan 2012 : 07:59:19 AM
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This thread should come with Kleenex As TAE says, things have a funny way of working out. If I had sold off or given away all my rugs it would have got me a fortune to buy the same rugs all over again. I totally agree though, to look at your horses tack will sting for some time. But keep hold of it, don't make snappy decisions when you are still so full of grief and loss, it may be a comfort to you later. I have decided to sell Harley's saddle this weekend. That's 10 months an expensive Black Country has sat there gathering dust but our tack means more to us than that, its value doesn't. It's who it came off and how many fun times we had sat in it :) Meg, having a sort through is a good idea, but be prepared to be saddened. But you've got to do it at some point, maybe a friend come help? Giving something to a charity or sanctuary is a lovely idea. Through all my grief of losing Harley when I got that letter suddenly things were just getting that little bit brighter x |
Carole & Kes, West Sussex. |
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carole ferguson
Silver Member
United Kingdom
457 Posts |
Posted - 31 Jan 2012 : 12:13:18 PM
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Must admit - I kept all Asti's and Honey's rugs etc - and have even still got some rugs and tack from my first horse who was PTS in 1980 - but most things will fit one of my girls. Even Asti's 6'6" rugs are O.K. on her grand-daughter Venessa. Hate to think what everything would have cost to replace with new.
You never stop missing your dear friends - but just remember all the good times you had together. |
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glo
Gold Member
England
1297 Posts |
Posted - 31 Jan 2012 : 12:27:36 PM
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Hi Maggie-Lu, Get some of those storage boxed from a removal company and pack all of Mouse,s things in to the boxes tape up with brown tape and pack in Shed, Loft, Garage etc. If after a year or more if you still don't want Mouses things they can be given away then. I know that you are feeling sad at Mouse,s passing, get a good friend to help and a bottle of wine and you,ll feel much better after a good cry and chat about the things you loved about Mouse. You will always have the memory's that you made together and as time passes you will come to look on them with fondness. We all love you and sent you hugs and kisses. |
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