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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 4:04:12 PM
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My horse will not ride out by herself, she hacks out wonderfully with company, be it another horse, walker, cyclist etc and if i take her out for walks in hand she's the most chilled out, calm pony, not spooky at all, we've been trying walking out in hand and then getting on and riding back, not too bad yesterday but then today a total disaster again, we walked past a traffic cone while i was on the ground and she didn't bat an eyelid, i get on and we turn around to walk back and suddenly the traffic cone, the very same one we've JUST walked past has now become the biggest mountain lion ever so much so that its worth running backwards into the road when a van is coming then throwing yourself about like an idiot, i have to get off AGAIN at this point as she's rooted in the middle of the road, now cars waiting in both directions and so i walked her home again she spooks at everything while i'm on her yet doesn't bat an eyelid at anything if i'm on the ground, and is napping on the way home too, as soon as something spooks her thats it, she roots to the floor and refuses to budge if i push her she goes backward...i'm beginning to think she hates me, i'm about ready to give up as i know we're just becoming a danger on the road and people will start complaining about us soon only problem is i hardly ever have anybody to come out with me and with the lovely weather now here thought it would be nice to get out a bit more!!
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Milotkha
Gold Member
535 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 4:17:07 PM
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Oh Bigmac how frustrating that must be for you.
I would get on board from home and then walk her to a certain spot (have a tree or a car or what ever you like, in mind up the road), turn round at this point and then come home. I would do that every day, increasing the distance every so many days. Even if the first day is just out the farm... up the road a couple of metres, and then back. Repeat this every day. That is what I am going to do with my mare when she returns home.
Good Luck Kim x |
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Edited by - Milotkha on 29 Jun 2010 4:17:37 PM |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 4:28:24 PM
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It is very frustrating, i didn't even say goodbye to her today when i left i was sooooo down, now i feel really bad so will have to go say goodnight to her later i will try it that way tomorrow, getting straight on i don't think we'll get very far (maybe a few steps if we're lucky) but will give it a good go!! |
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Milotkha
Gold Member
535 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 4:36:58 PM
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Good things come to those who wait Be patience with her... it may be lack of confidence. Even if it is a few steps... thats better then none at all. |
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Helen Newton
Gold Member
England
692 Posts |
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Mrs Vlacq
Platinum Member
Wales
3776 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 5:03:48 PM
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Is she the same if you longreined her? or led her out and long reined her home? It sounds like a confidence thing in which case the onyl way to solve it is crack on and do lots of small bits to build her confidence, lots of praise when she makes a postive step and be very swift to correct the negative behaviour. So frustrating. Keep riding her out in company and asking her to lead at walk and trot, past bogey men and mountain lions |
- V Khazad - V Calacirya & V Sulime - Quarida(L) - V Boogie Knights - V Hamra Tofiq |
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Mrs DJ
Gold Member
632 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 5:08:45 PM
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Yes, how old is she, Bigmac?? And how long have you had her? It sounds like a confidence issue to me, but something that can definitely be worked on, with lots of time and patience. Is she an Arab? In my experience, they always have good reason for not complying (to them anyway - although it sometimes takes us a while to work it out). Please don't give up, and I'm positive she doesn't hate you! She wouldn't be so chilled out inhand if that were the case . |
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shah
Gold Member
England
1356 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 5:22:35 PM
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I sympathise entirely, having had three nappers on the trot despite being a confident rider I've come to the conclusion that all arabs are the same. They all lack confidence and are scatty - don't shoot me, it's just my opinion based on three arabs I've had and about ten that I had the pleasure of riding last year when trying to buy a horse.
Like you I have been down about it and it's one of the most frustrating problems you can have, it really is. It tears you down and makes you feel extremely inadequate. You just want to scream and cry and wonder what on earth you're doing wrong. Anyway, there is hope, although it won't feel like it for a while, it can take months to resolve so you need patience - lots of it
Some tips: > Natural horsemanship/Parelli work is extremely useful > Long reining is excellent > You need to work out why she's napping, is it pain, is it confidence, is it naughtiness, does she suffer from separation anxieties etc. > Ride extremely confidently with your leg on all the time > Sitting still for hours in one spot works for some > Reversing past the scary object/nappy spot (with mine it was often nothing scary, just a particular tree they didn't want to go past) works for some > Giving them the choice of working hard in the school or go for a nice little hack works for some > Getting on/off lots and lots of time work for some
And don't worry, she doesn't hate you. My boy hates me, he tried to kick and bite me today, ears back, wouldn't even allow me to put my hand on his neck. By the sound of your post your mare isn't that bad so there's plenty of hope |
West Sussex |
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shah
Gold Member
England
1356 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 5:24:01 PM
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Forgot to mention the wip-wop, the best tool I've ever used for nappers. |
West Sussex |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 5:39:51 PM
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Well the really terrible thing is she's 21 so she really has no excuse....i say to people "she can't help it she's just a baby" trying to find an excuse for her She is fine when she's in company it's not even that she needs to have a lead, as she's quite happy to ride out in front, she rides out well and confidently at the front she doesn't stop to look behind or worry where the other one is just knowing they're back there somewhere seems to do the trick, i bought her last year she was out of work and had been for 2 years due to the lady having had a baby, i just wanted a happy light hack, she's very well for her age and full of life, she's the sweetest nature, always comes running to say hello as soon as i get there, loves attention, being groomed etc, she does nip at me on occasion for no apparent reason but other than that is really loving. I started just walking her out in hand to get us used to each other and to see how she was in different situations and with traffic etc and she was very sensible and always keen to get out so i then started to hack her out with company or with my partner walking with it so it wasn't until i decided to go out one day on our own that i discovered we had this problem, as she's always been happy to ride out in front it never occured to me that she may be lacking in confidence but that does seem to be what it is, well either that or she's totally taking the mickey out of me |
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Fee
Platinum Member
2601 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 7:55:11 PM
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Hi bigmac,
I would recommend some groundwork to build your leadership/her confidence in you. Get her moving around until you can move her from your energy/body language, then you are really talking to her and she is really listening to you. Another good thing is to stay back at her back as you 'drive' her around. That way she is used to being in front with you leading her. Use the same tone and commands when on her back and all your leadership skills on the ground should transfer when in the saddle and she should feel confident. Or, as others have suggested I would do some long reining. I'm sure it does much the same thing as 'driving' as it's called in NH approaches.
Ditto others, it takes time, you will get there, don't give up.
Hope that helps some
Fee |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 8:50:47 PM
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Thankyou for your replies, will certainly give anything a go, don't want to give up, she's such a sweet girl (in every other way) i wonder if it's my own lack of confidence rubbing off onto her, i'll try some long reining with her and see how that goes. Just popped back and tucked her in for the night and she still came straight over for a scratch so must still like me a little bit!! |
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Kharidian
Platinum Member
England
4297 Posts |
Posted - 29 Jun 2010 : 10:49:56 PM
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In my opinion you've answered it yourself when you say "I get on and we turn around to walk back"......I think there & back walks/rides etc are to be avoided at all costs, for this very reason! Circular routes are the way to go, or, if not possible, there and back with a small circular detour at the turning point so your horse isn't just turning around to return.
I know I am very fortunate to have a variety of varying circular routes and Chips (13 months) will walk boldly around any of them - not knowing when he's heading home again and therefore equally ongoing where ever we happen to be. I did the same with Roger as a baby and can honestly say he has NEVER napped in all his 17 years walking/under saddle/in harness.
I think you'll have a big task ahead of you, but please try and be creative and get away from "there & back".
Caryn |
Kharidian (Prince Sadik x Khiri)........ Alkara Cassino (H Tobago x Rose Aboud) aka "Roger".................................... aka "Chips" The first image is from an original painting by Pat Shorto.
South-East Essex |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 07:47:59 AM
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We do have a circle we can walk and have miles of wonderful track rides straight out of our gate (i just can't manage the 8 mile walk round) i don't turn her as soon as i get on we do continue forward for a few metres before we turn, i had hoped we would move further forward each time before turning back but it really depends on what happens at the time, if i get on and she remains calm and relaxed we can continue forward for a few metres before turning but it's if she spooks at something then she refuses to move and if this happens as soon as i get on then we just won't go anywhere sometimes not even back the way we come she just backs up whenever i ask for a forward movement, spins (no matter which direction i turn to) soon as i get off again she's fine and will walk either way. |
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Montikka
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
2653 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 08:10:00 AM
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Hi bigmac is it possible that you feel unconfident when you're on-board? I get the feeling that if she is happy to be led out without other horses, she should be able to be ridden out. So, when you are riding, if you feel apprehensive she is picking up on this. Quite understandable that you should feel this way on the roads. Could you do a lot more ridden work away from the dangers of traffic to build up your confidence and get her listening to you? She sounds as though she needs a very confident, firm leader to help her deal with her anxieties this is not easy if you feel anxious too. -Do you have a school to work her in? It is very important to have her listening to YOU and not have a chaperone whilst schooling, only then is it safe to take her on the roads. Perhaps a few lessons would help too. Good luck!! |
Louise, Warwickshire |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 09:00:34 AM
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I think i'm being firm and confident with her, at least trying to be but maybe not enough so and like you say she's picking up on that, i do have a terrible habit of predicting every possible disaster that could occur on the road (i.e pheasant flies up out of verge, horse spooks just as car coming past and we land on top of car, speeding vehicle coming round bend runs straight into us, loose dog comes out of garden and chases us down road....i could go on all day) ummmmm so yes sounds like a big part of the problem is ME i can hardly expect her to walk out confidently when there's me sat on top forseeing all these possible dangers and most likely worrying her too! Maybe we do need to stay off the road for now, i don't have a school but was planning on post and railing an area in the corner of the field to turn into a working area so that may have to do. |
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pinkvboots
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
3290 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 09:41:09 AM
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I know how you feel but don't give up, have you got someone else there that is a very confident rider that could take her out and see if she does the same? I would stay off the road and be safe, I never ride Arabi on the road now he is terrified of moving traffic and with the time I persevered it never got better, I am lucky we have loads of off road riding, and he goes out happily on his own luckily he always has. You say she is OK if someone is with you on foot or a bicycle, maybe try setting out together and get them to hang back out of sight after a while. I hope you get it sorted out but your not alone so many horses wont go out alone. Good luck x |
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Quarabian
Platinum Member
Wales
4340 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 10:01:01 AM
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Maybe when you ride out with others you are less likely to anticipate the pheasants etc. Good advice has been given already, but I wonder how you can teach yourself not to tighten up when you think there is a danger coming. Horses can feel the slightest tension or even a change in your forward thinking. It is possible that this is what is causing the napping as she actually picks up from you that there is a reason to stop and check something out.
If you feel more confident on the ground (like I do) get off and lead her. There is no shame in that and she hasn't 'won' if you then get her walking forward again. Good Luck
Lynda |
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geegee
Platinum Member
England
3682 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 10:32:03 AM
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You've had some great advice already but I would just like to add that perhaps you should contact a Recommended Associate (RA) from intelligent horsemanship.
Whereabouts are you? I could try and find a contact for you, if you like. Failing that, you could just google....
If you could just have one visit and be given the "tools" to work with, this will not only boost your confidence but enable you to continue in the right direction.
I totally understand where you are coming from. My mare had very small comfort zones and I had to move her out them VERY, VERY SLOWLY. Every new experience was a complete drama for her and as our relationship improved the dramas lessened. This is when you know you have built a bond and the trust is there.
Clicker training works wonders too. I prefer Alexandra Kurland's methods. It gives the horse something to focus on instead of finding things for themselves.
Always reward the good behaviour and ignore the bad. I'm a firm believer in positive reinforcement.
Good luck |
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Montikka
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
2653 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 11:14:48 AM
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Completely understand how you feel bigmac - I had a break from riding and felt the same - I had a horse that would not work alone with me, she was young and it was a mixture of her trying it on and us both lacking a leader! She would rear inhand, bellow and run sideways, buck etc. Always fine in company though. I asked an ex- NH Jockey friend (who is fearless) to take her out solo a couple of times. It was quite remarkable how he just got on, no nonsence, and rode her away! A few spooks etc but nothing major because she was looking to him for leadership. He was up on the gallops and riding alone on the roads within an hour.
So now when I feel nervous, I think what would Robbie (the jockey do)? The old mantra - 'Keep riding calmly forward' has worked for all sorts of difficult behavior. At the moment you are both probably like two little friends telling each other ghost stories |
Louise, Warwickshire |
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Qui Gon Jinn
Platinum Member
Scotland
1627 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 1:18:32 PM
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I've has something similar from Merlyn! He has just turned 5 though and only broken this year!
He doesn't spook, but stops when he is on his own and refused to go on and will back away, he isn't frightened in any way, just testing to see if he can get away with it!! I put up with this for several days, getting off him and leading him on and then getting back on him, which would work for a few feet and then he would plant himself again before reversing!
What has worked for me is to turn him round and reverse him back the way I actually want to go! He was so surprised by this that when I turned him round again and drove him forward with my seat and legs, he went willingly and didn't try to stop or reverse again. His napping has become much less but any time he tries to back away, I simply turn him round and back him up a few week and then turn round and carry on.
Not sure if it will help you with your mare, but worth a try.
Good luck. |
The Soul would have no Rainbow....If the Eyes had shed no Tears. |
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Pony slave
Bronze Member
68 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 1:28:33 PM
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You poor thing, soooo frustrating for you. There is great advice on here, I would certainly advocate longreining, really drive her on past the dragons and if you can feel the nap coming drive her through it, if you are not confident using long reins get hold of someone that is as can easliy end up in a big pile of knitting!!
I do hope you get her sorted,
PS xx |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 30 Jun 2010 : 10:54:47 PM
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Thankyou for all the great advice everybody, there's lots of ideas there for me to think about and work on. I think i will try and find somebody who can come and ride her for me first so i can see if the problem is her or more to do with my lack of confidence, at least we'll be sure then which one of us needs working on |
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honey
Platinum Member
N. Ireland
2634 Posts |
Posted - 01 Jul 2010 : 12:03:55 AM
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big mac, i have this prob with my coloured mare. Its a security issue as with you she will walk anywhere in hand on her she refuses to go by anything that might eat her and smacking her ect is a waste of time. she hacks 100% in company, in front behind. Although she finds everything spooky going shes not spooky coming home. I have got her doing one little hack thats about 2 miles comfortably and its just i hacked her up and down this road so many times in company and she knows shes not far from home. Shes alot better if i take her somewhere she doesn't know as well. Its so furstrating and has meant i haven't been able to ride her over winters as she won't hack. I have some company this year though, so i will get to ride a few times. Have to say my purebred is so brave hes scared of nothing and would hack anywhere, but he used to nap at the start but he was a lot easier to solve a smack on the rump and he soon stopped it. |
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bigmac
Bronze Member
England
87 Posts |
Posted - 01 Jul 2010 : 07:36:03 AM
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I'm glad it's not just me with this very frustrating problem, Molly is the same in company, she's very brave and happy to go first or last, not really spooky at all. I don't have company anymore though so really stuck now (other than when i can persuade the other half he is in need of a good walk) |
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Bonnie
Bronze Member
England
179 Posts |
Posted - 25 Jul 2010 : 4:59:32 PM
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I've just bought myself a 10yr old arab chestnut mare ,well 6 weeks ago,last Thursday she put her anchors on and refused to go even a step forward,started backing up at speed or doing nothing at all if I tried to get her going forward.I've tried everything but drew the line at beating her to death!I intially didgive her 1 hard smack but as I acheived nothing continued to try everything else .She eventually (1hr)walked back to yard so I continued to urge her up past the yard to no avail.She quickly realised where the danger spots are ,ie fence car tree and tried to back into these,little monkey.....2hrs trying then it was darkso had to give up.FRi tried for 1 hr,sat 1hr .This morning ,always ride out of yard then she stopped again ,led her to steps off canal,got on same again,after 1 1/2 hrs came home,Lunged her in feild,up lane,then schooled her in feild THEN she marched straight out of yard and up lane,Counldn't beleive her.Not had her long so didn't know if she'd buck ,rear etc,we've been out alone and with company regularly from day one .think she's just telling me when SHE'S redy we'll go .love her to bits already,I know this will take time,,and that she's testing me,she's def not frightened or insecure.Worse than kids!!!!! |
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