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Kora
Silver Member
England
459 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 3:22:41 PM
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I did a very stupid action last week. I needed to get my horse HT Orient in quickly, as the Blacksmith was on his way. I had only just turned him out. He was having none of it so I took his feed bowl in to the field and hoped once he put his head in I could place the headcollar on. He told me basically to sod off, whizzed round and double barralled me with both hind feet. My husband found me half an hour later. He was initially horrified thinking I was dead as he saw me laying in the field. I was air lifted to hospital by helicopter . I suffered four broken ribs, a punctured lung and bruising. Firstly, it was purely my stupidity as I know he has kicked out before when someone tried to put a head collar on him whilst feeding in the field. I have told people NEVER to do it. So what did I do, never thought of the consequences , and the inevitable happened. Secondly, yes he was naughty and it is unacceptable behaviour, he should not have done it. But horses are horses and I should have known better. Since the incident my 75yr old husband has related the story and how he felt, to various well wishers,even becoming emotional and expressing his fear of what may have been. Orion ( HT Orient ) is a beautiful Arab who has quite a strong temperament. We respect each other and I accept his little quirky mannersisms. Hmm!! thats because I adore him. I have had him for seven years now and he has given me such wonderful experiences and rides since I broke him as a 6 yr old. However, he will always be a fiesty animal ( temperament wise)and while I can handle him very easily, others are more cautious. But he can also be such a loving horse and we have spent many an hour just enjoying being close. Cutting a long story short, it devastated me seeing my husband almost in tears and he now sees Orion in a totally different light. In other words he would like me to sell him. Alan told me when I do Endurance he cannot relax until I phone him telling him all is well. He feels the same even if I just hack out on my own. If anything happened to me how would he cope with two horses, 15 Alpacas, a Llama, 3 dogs etc Orion is brilliant at Endurance and has won the EGB Lancashire Arab Cup for 3 years on the trot. We have completed every ride we have entered and never been vetted out. He oozes showmanship and also has many rosettes to his name in the show ring including a Supreme Champion. But I so reluctantly will have to sell him , mainly because my husband does not want the risk or possibility that I may be accidently injured again. He feels so anxious every time I am with Orion. I think all he can see now is a powerful animal that is capable of doing some serious harm. Looking back Alan also admitted whilst accepting Orion was indeed a stunning Arab he much prefers my old pony Huggy Bear who is like a Volvo car in relation to perhaps a Ferarri. Yet, I have only ever fallen off Orion twice in 7 yrs and once was when I lost my stirrup. He is a brilliant ride , safe, but forward going, and I am on such a high when I dismount . Yet this one incident , has caused such alot of stress and anxiety for Alan and heart break on my part. Can you Arabian liners forgive me for being such a whuss. Some of you may criticise my actions, maybe I deserve it. My heart has always ruled my head where animals are concerned. But for once, when I listen to what my hubby feels like, and my twin sister ,who feels my pain,both my head and my heart say , try to rehome him. But it must be to a confident, loving new owner who can either take him further in the Endurance field or even re enhance his show career of which he was extremely successful at. This is breaking my heart and the tears are flowing as I write this to you. You also may wonder why I have not been on the forum for a long while. Both my parents have died of Cancer, my elder sister was diagnosed with Ovarian cancer 18 mths ago which has spread to her lungs and liver, and my twin sister is just recovering from Breast cancer. As we are twins I am having preventative surgery, and my next operation will be a full mastectomy later on this year. So we have had alot to occupy ourselves at present. I do hope some of you can find it in your hearts to try and understand why I am doing what I have to do as I know others will possibly totally disagree . Maybe when all this is over I may look for another Huggy Bear who at least will please hubby and twin sister.
Kora x
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TanyanChewy
Gold Member
England
1092 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 3:59:09 PM
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Kora, having just read your post I have to say I really feel for you. Its clear that you adore your boy and that this is an incredibly tough decision. It would be cruel to berate you for making the 'wrong' decision because its obviously not been an easy one and you have had a lot of other things thrown your way that have to be taken into consideration.
I sincerely hope that you find a loving & permanent home for your boy and that you will be able to keep in contact. Is that him in your signature pics? He looks very handsome :)
Sending you lots of hugs xx |
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RUTHIE
Gold Member
United Kingdom
1238 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 6:12:45 PM
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My heart goes out to you. The love you have for this horse shines in your words. Iam sure you have given this decision much thought and soul searching. I wish you and your family the best and hope your boy finds a home close to you. Good luck. |
In Memory of Crystal Flash 2010-2012 |
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cmj
Silver Member
France
383 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 6:15:57 PM
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It is very sad but you are doing the right thing I'm sure. It's clear you will make sure he gets a good home. They can all hurt us by accident and that is worrying enough, but to deliberately kick you is totally out of order. Your husband is seeing the plain daylight situation but because you love your horse you are excusing him and saying it is your fault.
Hope I'm coming across as sympathetic here and not hard hearted. We are capable of handling various difficulties in horses at different times in our lives. Whilst you are obviously well capable of handling what he throws at you, is it worth the risk of the one time you take your eye off the ball? He is obviously a super athlete so should be snapped up by a serious endurance rider, I hope.
Personally I daren't even ride my youngster on the road as I am sure he will kill me due to the lack of training I have put in.....he is going for proper western training then I may well have to sell him. Yet I backed and trained all my horses in the past and this one is no more difficult. No point being brave and broken when you are old enough for it to matter :(
It is a horrible situation you find yourself in but be positive, you will look back on the good memories and also know that you have taken the dread away from your poor husband.
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Kharidian
Platinum Member
England
4297 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 6:30:31 PM
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What a horrid decision to have to make. I hope you find a lovely, permanent home.
Caryn
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Kharidian (Prince Sadik x Khiri)........ Alkara Cassino (H Tobago x Rose Aboud) aka "Roger".................................... aka "Chips" The first image is from an original painting by Pat Shorto.
South-East Essex |
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barbara.gregory
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
4531 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 6:50:58 PM
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I hope you are recovering well, Kora. It is a heartbreaking decision to have to make but one you know in your heart it has to be made. Is he entire or a gelding? You will be nervous around him and that will make him worse. I do hope you find a lovely home for him. Where are you?
My stallion is protective over his food although he tolerates me going in his stable and doing things while he is eating but I wouldn't let anyone else do it as I am sure he would see them off!
I hope there is no one on here who will critisise you or make you feel bad about your decision and at 75 your husband shouldn't have to look after you while you recover and also spend the time if it will happen again. Next time you could be killed.
Big hug (ouch, that was painful)! Once you find a super home for him and your injuries have healed you will feel a lot better.
Best wishes.
Barbara |
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Qui Gon Jinn
Platinum Member
Scotland
1627 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 7:14:07 PM
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What a sad turn of events for you Kora. I really feel for you, but totally understand how you feel about it all.
I think you are doing what is right for your own situation and NO ONE should be stupid enough to judge you. I wish you all the luck there is and that you can find Orion a new home soon. ((((Hugs)))) xx |
The Soul would have no Rainbow....If the Eyes had shed no Tears. |
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alison
Platinum Member
Wales
1810 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 7:22:29 PM
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You are definitely making the right decision and I'm sure with his endurance history he will be snapped up. Please get well soon and concentrate on hubby and your other animals. Sending Alison |
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Eeyore
Gold Member
1181 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 7:30:34 PM
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I really feel for you, I have always admired HT Orient and thought what a stunning boy he is. If you do go through with selling him someone will be extremely lucky indeed and if he is a safe ride I'm sure you will have no shortage of offers.
I can totally sympathise with the shocked husband scenario. Marim threw me very badly last summer and I was airlifted to hospital. My husband watched it all unfold and was very shaken by the whole experience, when he first ran to me I wasn't breathing! Marim then went to vet hospital for tests because he has always been extremely unpredictable but while there earned himself an asbo by kicking the vet across the room and lashing out at everyone else. I could never sell him, because I love him so much and because I would never trust anyone else to be fair to him, his quirks are major ones.
All I would say is don't rush into anything. Be fair to yourself and your boy by giving yourself more thinking time. Wishing you all the best x |
Heléna
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Kora
Silver Member
England
459 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 7:31:35 PM
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Yes, I do so so love him, people may feel how could I sell if I felt so strongly about him, but I have tormented myself over and over again until I am drained, and my decision is finally made. Barbara, he was a stallion when I brought him home and had him gelded, then I broke him myself, and he was so easy, especially when I lacked confidence in my own ability to break an Arab of which I have never known. I live in Lancashire. Tanyanchewy, and Yes he is the handsome chap in my signature photos. Thank you all so much for your support as this makes me feel a little more settled in my mind , I wanted to turn to you all as I also knew and would respect all your opinions. God! am crying again, best go! x |
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Misshana
Silver Member
England
449 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 7:41:10 PM
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I feel for you, I have made a similar decision recently. My brother in law came off his horse in April and sustained brain damage. I came off my horse in similar circumstances 3 weeks later and luckily only sustained bruising. But my family then all said how worried they were about me when riding and especially in view of brother in laws accident. I am 62 and decided to let my mare go to a new home. After 30+ years of riding it has been a very hard decision. I have kept my old retired Arab and can have a little poodle on him. I think sometimes you hve to consider other peoples feelings too. I wish you all the best whatever your final decision. |
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moatside
Platinum Member
England
3224 Posts |
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pinkvboots
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
3290 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 7:43:46 PM
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You dont need to be forgiven, you have been through so much i think you are very brave dont beat yourself up about it, i hope everything works out for you x |
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Kora
Silver Member
England
459 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 8:09:00 PM
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Yes, Eeyore, I love him sooooo much is why I feel its best to let go now while he still has so much in life to give. He is a safe ride, yes the odd spook, but he doesn't do anything mega, its like he jumps on the spot, but he can be forward going and other times, so laid back. I have been through with him his 'greenness' and 'maturing ' I agree though, will I find that special person who will be fair to him and take time to understand his quirks . He is by no means a dangerous horse at all, he just pulls faces, and silly things like that. ( And of course don't try and put a headcollar on whilst eating in the field out of his feed bucket.) He will come to call and I have always caught him easily in the field but that day...well!!!!!!!!!! say no more. Kora x |
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annas
Gold Member
United Kingdom
1129 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 8:26:44 PM
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I am so sorry that you have been having such a rough time. I cannot imagine the stress you and your family have been under. My heart goes out to you. Truly, I am sending you huge hugs. As far as your boy is concerned I am in no doubt that you have made the right decision for all of you. I had a very challenging gelding who also double barrelled me in the field, and seriously hurt others too. Letting him go after rescuing and rehabilitating him was hard, I'd had him as an 18 month old, wild and deeply dangerous arab colt. We'd gone to hell and back together and he came out the other end, quite a nice boy. BUT I would never have trusted him, you couldn't, he was micro managed to avoid situations. I have another Arab and a thoroughbred who I realise may accidentally barrell into me, I may fall of them one day, but they would never intentionally harm me. Orion and my boy rupert had their time, their chances. We owe them nothing apart from doing what we can to find the best homes. Roo has been gone a year and the relief I feel is immense. He was always a responsibility. I could ask any groom to handle my others, not him. You are doing the right thing. Take care of yourself and keep us all updated, we are here for you. |
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mouse
Silver Member
United Kingdom
309 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 8:28:15 PM
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What a tough decision to have to make, but you can find him a loving new home and your husband will be able to sleep easy at night. So sorry about all your family's illnesses - my heart goes out to you.
Mouse |
South Norfolk/Suffolk border |
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brack369
Gold Member
559 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 9:16:24 PM
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Dear me, what a run of bad luck! I think you are being very sensible about the whole situation and it is clear that you will ensure Orion finds only the best of homes. Really hope things improve for you and your family very soon x |
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phoenixbruka
Gold Member
England
1190 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 9:20:26 PM
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Kora I take my hat off to you for making such a brave decision
I know we always put our horses first... but just sometimes... you have to do whats best for everyone, and at 75 it must have been REALLY scarey for your husband to think he'd lost you forever and with everything else you've had on your plate recently it really does seem like your doing the right thing
Best of luck with finding him a fantastic new home
susie |
www.liveryatcordwell.co.uk |
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natntaz
Platinum Member
England
2919 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 10:00:12 PM
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God i feel for you, with all that you are going through in your personal life and then to have all this on top. You have to do what is right for you and your family and if that is to rehome your boy then no one can knock you for that. I really hope you can find him a lovely forever home which in turn will help you come to terms with your decision. He looks to be a lovely boy. Good luck with your health and family and of coarse to find a home for your lovely boy x I feel so choked for you as i couldnt imagine being in your shoes xxx |
Natalie Pix. Essex. Tariq ibn Radfan and Taroub |
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joanna_piana
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
3935 Posts |
Posted - 05 Jul 2012 : 11:47:09 PM
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It sounds like you have made the right decision. I'm sure he will find a fabulous home with someone who will have lots of fun with him. Wishing you all the best. |
Harthall Rashida RIP, Binley Ishara, Bouchan Chorleywood, Hertfordshire |
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Roseanne
Moderator
United Kingdom
6708 Posts |
Posted - 06 Jul 2012 : 1:13:38 PM
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Only just seen this and I too think you have definitely come to the right conclusion.
We aren't as resilient or quick as we get older - our reactions are slower and we don't bounce or heal as quickly. Much as we love our horses most of us do have other priorities which sometimes just have to take first place - and family considerations are of prime importance.
I'm sure it helps to have support in your decision as some people do think there are no circumstances in which anyone should sell any horse they have taken on.
But we all do it - for all sorts of very good reasons, and your long list of reasons is more than enough for you to lessen the worry and fear of your husband and family.
Horses do adapt well with new owners, much as we would like to think they won't or can't. Orion's a proven horse in endurance and showing and in spite of the fact that he's lost respect and treated you like a horse on this occasion, he still has masses to give.
Be easy on yourself. I know you provide your animals with a haven there and you have nothing to reproach yourself for.
Sending lots of love and hugs and wishing you and your sister very well. |
Roseanne |
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Kora
Silver Member
England
459 Posts |
Posted - 06 Jul 2012 : 3:07:35 PM
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I honestly felt I was going to receive a little more criticism for feeling the need to Sell my boy on. But as usual you liners offer the kind support and understanding to come to the right decision. Alan, my husband , at the moment ,is bringing Orion in from the field, and yet! I am petrified Orion will pick up on his anxiety, this decision is not only about how Alan and Jan feel but also if anything happened to Alan whilst with Orion I could never forgive myself. I must start handling him again very soon and put my 'pain' aside. Roseanne , as you say , as we get older ( and I feel old !!! ) our priorities change and in the past my animals have always come first, but this one stupid incident I feel has really affected my family. I shall advertise here , perhaps next week, when I feel strong enough emotionally to do so. Thank you all !
Kora x |
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arabesque
Silver Member
339 Posts |
Posted - 06 Jul 2012 : 6:03:49 PM
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I really sympathise with you! Under those circumstances though you will be doing the right thing by him. It sounds like he'd be a lovely horse for a young rider with masses of confidence and ambition who wants to go and do things. Even if he stays with you now, I'm sure he'll pick up on the vibes around him.
I'm sure you'll find him a lovely home who'll want to keep in touch with you - if they like the horse enough they'll understand how hard it is for you!
Take care and be nice to yourself |
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sab2
Platinum Member
8467 Posts |
Posted - 06 Jul 2012 : 6:57:25 PM
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Bless you what am awful situation to be in, i do hope that you are recovering well. I think that you are being very brave , i often worry if something happens to me that my OH wouldn,t cope, i am lucky that i have lots of friends who would help him out but its still a worry. Orion i am sure will settle into a new life very happily, there are some lovely people out there who i am sure would love the chance of owning such a lovely boy. Do not beat yourself up about this sometimes things just do not work out the way we want to so chin up and i hope your feeling better soon |
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gossy
Platinum Member
England
3639 Posts |
Posted - 06 Jul 2012 : 7:33:25 PM
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only you can make the decision, trade in OH seriously all should have a contigency plan for whatever eventually can happen when you have horses. |
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Arabianknights
Bronze Member
England
156 Posts |
Posted - 06 Jul 2012 : 8:50:04 PM
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I'd be very surprised (and disappointed) if anyone on AL was to "judge you". You're making the right decision and I'm sure you will find him a lovely home. |
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