| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
|
Wyllow
Platinum Member
 United Kingdom
2885 Posts |
 Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 12:20:05 AM
|
....to you at work?
Even the most tedious working environments have their "moments" and depending on your place of work and the people there....even the nature of what you do....hysteria can happen at work!
The nature of what I did for a living at one point in my life ws responsible for hilarity on a regular basis....this is just one tale....
Some of the routines I devised at that point WERE a bit naff, I confess  and the music of the day, mainly Stock Aitken and Waterman acts were even NAFFER ....wait for it...
I was a fitness instructor for seven years with the local adult education authority and used to spend hours shouting my head off at people who paid to suffer  !!! No!!! We actually had a right old laugh giggling at wobbly bits and falling about when some who lay down for exercises couldn't then get up again!
All manner of things used to make us laugh from underwear hanging out of leotards ( remember THEM?? ) to flesh hanging out of underwear, hanging out of leotards.....people who really couldn't run on the spot owing to bladder control issues ~ two used to run from the place every week when we did this, bless them....to those with knees that cracked like gunshots ~ ummmm....that would have been ME, I'm afraid!
I had one lady, who liked a drink....she also loved her food ~ well, I assume the result of that was why she came to my classes! Thing was....she had the most appalling WIND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Now, ladies, time for floor exercises", I'd say and turn the tape up...but it was NEVER loud enough to cover her embarrassment every time she lifted a leg!
The first week it happened, I kept poker faced and all the others bit their lips and kept their eyes to the front!
The second week, the lady next door to her flatulent neighbour, pulled a face at her friend ~ the culprit must have had a curry or something as the room suddenly became "hot" enough for me to open the window. Well, I took it to be hot as ladies all over the room were FANNING themselves!!!!!
Third week came and even before class, it was clear that the windy woman was already in trouble ~ something about her walk....and all the others were pointing and sniggering like school girls.
Well, she survived the standing routines ~ and so did we ~ very gratefully, even if her buttocks looked far more unusually tucked in than usual ~ " GREAT POSTURE !  " I said and one woman started to giggle.
"Now, mats from the back of the gym, ladies, please, " I asked....and they all got them....Windy Woman not bending much to grab hers....
"Ok, let's have you lying on your sides, head supported on the arm and we'll go for 16 repetitions, side leg raises...."
"I should be so lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky" warbled Kylie from the speakers of my totally inadequate casette player ( ages ago now!)
Yes, "Windy" wasn't so lucky that day and the resulting "trumpet solo" finally cracked it.....we all rolled about helplessly laughing and clutching our ribs.
None of us could stop and the class was full ~ so you can imagine the sound.
Kylie was drowned out but NOT Windy! She was laughing too, completely out of control of way too many bodily functions now and the more she laughed the more she "BLEW" and the more she did, the more we laughed.
I used to have a great following for the classes back then ~ I taught several a week ~ it was WONDERFUL I was having fun and being paid to work out and stay a size 8  ~ but suddenly, for some reason, that class became even more popular!!!
There's no accounting for taste, is there?
I saw this lovely woman ~ she was , really ~ in the supermarket the other day with several cans of lager in her basket! She's obviously STILL going strong!
She must still work out ~ she looked good! I don't!!! No gym or diets for me!!! The kids and horses keep me down to a size 10 ~ slipping , there, you see!!!!
I have VERY fond memories as a whip~cracking fitness coach and old class members still come up and laugh with me about the fun we used to have in the gyms of the local schools during the evenings ~ 15 years ago now! I gave up when I had Juliette and she's 14! WOW!
Go on ~ what's stopped the traffic through YOUR workplace ?
~Nicci~
|
Edited by - Wyllow on 18 Feb 2005 12:20:56 AM
|
|
Report to moderator
|
|
|
tracey_c
Gold Member
England
1009 Posts |
Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 12:46:30 AM
|
The reception was really busy today, I was taking calls while my collegue was looking after the vistitors. Whilst talking to a customer on the phone, my system decided to close down - at that very second, everyone went quite while I quite innocently said in a loud voice
"can you bear with me for a second sir, my computer is going down on me!"
There were some funny looks flying round for a few moments!!! |
********G4 ROCK********
*****BUT NOT AS MUCH AS THE ARABIAN!***** |
Report to Moderator  |
|
|
tracey_c
Gold Member
England
1009 Posts |
Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 10:37:50 AM
|
OH, Another...
I used to work in a lab that did on-call (24hr service) and they had a "chill out" room which had a bed and fridge etc in side.
I went out one night and knowing full well i had to be in work the next day got ABSOLUTELEY BLADDERED! I went home and went to bed as usual but woke up halfway through the night in a strange place - WORK!!!!
It was soooo funny but at least I wasn't late!!!! |
********G4 ROCK********
*****BUT NOT AS MUCH AS THE ARABIAN!***** |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Wyllow
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
2885 Posts |
Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 12:27:51 PM
|
Yep, these are those priceless moments indeed, Tracey!!!
Honestly, the things you say in all innocence!
Live TV, of course is a nightmare for presenters at work....
I'll never forget watching Anne Diamond and Nick whatever his name was on Breakfast TV ages ago.....there was a really soppy story being featured and Nick made a really sweet and sentimental remark....and Anne Diamond uttered the immortal words, LIVE, in front of THOUSAND of TV Viewers :
"Awwwww Nick! You've gone all soft on me!"
to which he replied:
"I'm sorry, Anne, it happens sometimes!"
The picture on the telly started to shake as the cameraman laughed, the laughter of the whole crew could be heard and Anne and Nick blushed scarlet and giggled uncontrollably.
Cue commercial break!!!!
How's THAT for a really public work bloomer ?!?!
And speaking of TV presenters....a young local presenter with Channel TV in Jersey who was being "broken in" with our own kid's TV spot "Puffin's Pla(i)ce", featuring a really badly behaved Puffin named Oscar and his friends.
The Puffin puppet was getting out of control as the man with his hand up it's bum was clearly trying to wind up the new presenter who was trying to beat him off and regain control ... and the poor thing blurted out:
"PUFFIN!!!! Will you just go and s*it over there !!!!"
INSTANT BLACK OUT!!!!!
Then again....when I was working with the cast of "Peter Pan" during my short stint as a performer ( hahaha!), we decided to play a trick on Captain Hook. There was a part in the play where the Pirate threatens the band of children that if they don't do as he demands, there will be dire consequences....
Now, the actor playing the Captain was a marvellous and very talented, very experienced and VERY self assured man. Nothing seemed to bother him...NOTHING....but that day on stage, WE did!
As he waved his Hook at us menacingly, Michael, John, Wendy, Peter and ME ~ a Lost Boy ( yes, really) who were caught in a net at the time....we all ~ instead of cringing with fear, advanced en masse on the Captain and chorused, "Surrender,? NEVER!!! We'd rather walk the PLANK!!!!"
Well, the Captain looked as if he'd been SHOT! He forgot his lines, none of us could help him as we were all laughing so much....we tripped over the net and fell off the stage in a heap and laughed all the more ....and the audience just thought it was part of the performance and were killing themselves! meanwhile, the recorded sound track started up with the music for a song we had to sing and we all scrambled back onstage and joined in one by one as we got our breath back ~ NOT in the script, but a darned sight funnier!!!!!
~Nicci
|
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
sub
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
1919 Posts |
Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 3:57:57 PM
|
I just watched my office buddy (we share and office) be a complete blonde!! (no offence - she´s blonde anyway)
She´s trying to put a disc in the drive, but can´t do it - she says it doesn´t fit. So I ask her " Are you trying to put it in the floppy drive?"
"no" she says - "The cd tray is out but the disc wont fit in"
Someone else suggests that it might be a midi disc player (she´s swedish and doesn´t know we´re taking the micky)
When I go to help her, the problem is glaring me int he face.
"Arja" I say "The hard drive is upside down!"
She hadn´t noticed that DELL was upsidedown!!
Made me laugh for an hour - Mini disc player |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
tracey_c
Gold Member
England
1009 Posts |
Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 3:59:37 PM
|
| sat here giggling at the funny things we do! |
********G4 ROCK********
*****BUT NOT AS MUCH AS THE ARABIAN!***** |
| Report to Moderator |
|
|
Wyllow
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
2885 Posts |
Posted - 18 Feb 2005 : 4:05:17 PM
|
Yes, a very truly "blonde" moment, says she, so very proud of her "highlights"!!!!!
~Nicci |
| Report to Moderator |
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
Topic Locked 