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Honeyb060674
Platinum Member
 United Kingdom
4301 Posts |
 Posted - 03 May 2008 : 09:04:23 AM
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Here ' s a Goodun for ya.
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop in Dingle, they walk over to the bird section and Gerry says to Paddy, 'Dat's dem.'
The owner comes over and asks if he can help them.
'Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere little budgies in dat cage up dere,' says Gerry.
The owner puts the budgies in a cardboard box.
Paddy and Gerry pay for the birds, leave the shop and get into Gerry's truck to drive to the top of the Connor Pass.
At the Connor Pass, Gerry looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, 'Dis looks like a grand place.'
He takes two birds out of the box, puts one on each shoulder and jumps off the cliff.
Paddy watches as the budgies fly off and Gerry falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself stone dead.
Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Paddy shakes his head and says, 'Feck dat. Dis budgie jumping is too feck'n dangerous for me!' 
THERE'S MORE...
Moment's later; Seamus arrives up at ConnorPass.
He's been to the pet shop too and walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another cardboard box in one hand and a shotgun in the other.
'Hi, Paddy, watch dis,' Seamus says.
He takes a parrot from the box and lets him fly free.
He then throws himself over the edge of the cliff with the gun.
Paddy watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and shoots the parrot.
Seamus continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body.
Paddy shakes his head and says, 'And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either!' 
IT IS NOT OVER YET...
Paddy is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Sean appears.
He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a cardboard box out of which he pulls a chicken.
Sean then takes the chicken by its legs and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down and down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine.
Once more Paddy shakes his head.
'Fook dat, lads. First dere was Gerry with his budgie jumping, den Seamus parrotshooting... And now Sean and his fook'n hengliding!'
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Claire & Sunny x
http://sunnyandclaire.blogspot.com/ |
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moatside
Platinum Member
England
3224 Posts |
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vjc
Platinum Member
United Kingdom
4952 Posts |
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Ludanella
Bronze Member
England
76 Posts |
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basbob
Gold Member
France
1356 Posts |
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dreammagic
Gold Member
Scotland
641 Posts |
Posted - 03 May 2008 : 3:49:12 PM
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| Brilliant ha ha |
    
Equine Photograpic 1st 3 pics, JPS EQUINE 4th pic |
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arabic
Platinum Member
England
4562 Posts |
Posted - 03 May 2008 : 10:09:18 PM
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| That is well worth the read - really, really good!!! |
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KHA`LILAH
Bronze Member
France
104 Posts |
Posted - 04 May 2008 : 09:14:45 AM
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A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood he started shouting inthe middle of the show:
"Look, it's not the same hat."
"Look, he is hiding the flowers under the table."
"Hey, why are all the cards the Ace of Spades?"
The magician was furious but couldn't do anything; it was, after all, the captain's parrot.
One day the ship had an accident and sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the ocean with the parrot, of course.
They stared at each other with hate, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and another and another.
After a week the parrot said: "OK, I give up. Where's the boat?"
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ashabarab
Gold Member
England
1378 Posts |
Posted - 04 May 2008 : 6:26:43 PM
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keep 'em coming....we need cheering up
ash |
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