| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| arabian |
Posted - 14 Oct 2010 : 10:04:15 PM
Hi guys,
having lost my beloved boy in july i find myself endlessly searching adds for a new friend to share lifes ups and downs with....its a scary position to be in as i blindly believed everything i was told when i bought my lad three years ago ........ i knew he was for me the minute i laid my eyes on him he was special and i knew it we just clicked from the start they told me they couldnt wait for me to get him vetted because they had an offer from a potential buyer so if i wanted him vetted i would miss out...you got it i parted with the money i had scrimped and scraped together and took him home that day....to cut a very long story short he must of been drugged or something when i tried him because when i tried to ride him after giving him time to settle it was very clear he had a major back problem.....i traced his original owner who told me she had given him away as a companion as he couldnt be ridden due to his back problem.....anyway needless to say i kept him spent money blood sweat and tears to try and help him all to no evail as he got worse and worse until the very sad day i had to let him go but though all this i will never regret a single day in those three years and still believe i was meant to have him the only regret is that hes no longer with me 
I have put an advert on horses wanted just waiting for it to go on but i didnt have a clue how to fit everything i wanted to say in 0 words so i asked admin if i could put more detail on the forum so with their kind permission here i am 
Ive not done a lot of regular riding over the years due to raising my family but have worked with horses on and off throughout this time i am rusty but dont think it would take too long to get back in the saddle like riding a bike so they say
i rent a small private yard with my friend who has her arab mare there and a couple of rescue donkeys for company nice little place post and rail paddocks small school stables and the fields also have shelters but my stable and fields are empty 
im really looking for a confidence giving soul that would be happy to have a pleasure home mainly hacking/pleasure rides with a bit of fun inhand showing at local level i can offer lazy days and comfy nights and oodles and oodles of love...
im not in a position to buy outright unless i win the lottery sharpish but can do loan, prefer with view to buy or deposit/terms?I am saving and will continue to do so in the meantime but thought it was worth posting on here on the hope that some of you guys may be able to or know of someone that could help?
If anyone has any ideas or suggestions could they please pm me by request of admin thanks for reading :)
p.s im 5ft9 and 13 stone (dieting as we speak ) :)
(admin approved) |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| jacki |
Posted - 04 Nov 2010 : 08:38:13 AM
Any news yet? I keep wondering what you have decided. |
| garnet |
Posted - 02 Nov 2010 : 7:13:17 PM
I agree with what Quarabian just said - we have had far more problems with adult horses than with the three babies we have raised. Our very first horse was a similar experience to yours which you described at the beginning of your thread, Arabian. It was heartbreaking for us (I was 35 and had waited all my life for a horse of my own) but we had had her vetted and got our money back via the Veterinary Defence Society. Technically she was carcase value but we were able to get her a place at Ada Cole from where she spent another 20 years very happily in two foster homes and we were able to keep in touch with her. We think she had been injured out hunting, patched up/rested/drugged and sold to us as ready to compete. Our only consolation was that she could so easily have ended up going through sales to the meat man instead of having the nice life she did. We are still good friends with her first foster mum who is now in NZ.
Blathering on a bit there, but you get my point - with a baby you are starting with a clean sheet and not picking up someone else's mistakes. You can bring her up to be the way YOU want. |
| Quarabian |
Posted - 02 Nov 2010 : 11:55:30 AM
The advice you have received on here is good, but only you can make the decision. I echo what others have said about not being put off by the backing. From personal experience it isn't a big deal. You are definately turning it into some kind barrier. Take it slowly, build the trust with plenty of groundwork and follow your instincts. The riding on stage is another story, but it sounds like you have the experience and emotional stability to guide her through it.
If she already feels right for you it is a small issue to deal with. You can buy more problems with a supposedly trained horse!
Clear your head, think about what you want and how you are going to get there. Try not to imagine the worse, more likely you will be laughing about how easy it is and why you worried so much. |
| jo78 |
Posted - 02 Nov 2010 : 08:08:50 AM
Great advice on above posts.I too think `follow your instinct` which ever way that might lead you. As previously said you will just `know` when you find your partner, and i believe that if there is any if or buts then leave alone, as Gods army wont stop you when you find him/her    |
| jo78 |
Posted - 02 Nov 2010 : 08:08:18 AM
Great advice on above posts.I too think `follow your instinct` which ever way that might lead you. As previously said you will just `know` when you find your partner, and i believe that if there is any if or buts then leave alone, as Gods army wont stop you when you find him/her |
| arabianrio |
Posted - 01 Nov 2010 : 1:53:54 PM
I too had sleepless nights when I originally had doubts about my Laddie.Yet I too couldn't stop thinking about him. I lasted a week, eventually phoned up the owner again, went to see him the following day and bought him! I haven't looked back since!
Good Luck with whatever you decide.
|
| LadyLuck1 |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 8:59:28 PM
Listen to your heart and good luck.
Mary |
| oliviaw |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 7:37:29 PM
Go for it!
Everyone has to have a 'first' baby!
xx |
| jacki |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 7:12:15 PM
Personaly if I think if you have the time and love to put in and the bonus of good advice at the end of a phone, you can't go wrong. And if you keep thinking about her she must be very special or have a connection with your heart is emotional your head can overthink but your gut is usually right! Good luck no matter what you choose |
| Kharidian |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 7:09:31 PM
Arabian,
Why do you think you wouldn't have the experience to back a youngster? If you can do the groundwork and you're a reasonably competent rider then you can back your baby! I'd never brought on a youngster before Roger but we learned together! He's now 17 and no-one else has ever ridden him (other than holding the occasional very young child on him to "back" him at about 2 or 3 years old)....hhmm, must arrange to "borrow" a small child to sit on Chips next year).
Give it a go, you can always arrange for schooling later (if you feel it necessary).
Caryn |
| Fee |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 6:58:28 PM
Ditto everyone, please don't let the backing thing worry or stop you getting her if she's the one. When she's ready to be backed perhaps you'll have such a great relationship and trust you'll do it yourself or maybe you'll find someone to help or send her to someone etc etc. It's lovely to be the first to ride them, such an honour 
Go by your gut and you wont go wrong, good luck and keep us posted!
Fee x |
| Callisto |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 6:51:06 PM
I have bought two 4 year olds and a 3 year old, none of them was what I meant to buy (wanted a 6-9 year old), but I haven't regretted any of them, one was broken but I sent the other two away to be backed. Have never regretted a moment, as suggested above, book yourself a regular lesson to keep you on track, hack out with a sensible other horse while they are still green, and if you are concerned about something just ask for advice (you will get plenty on here  ). They do choose you - if this is the one then just accept it  . Time passes very quickly and they soon grow up! |
| garnet |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 2:28:04 PM
Would you be able to have lessons at home? When I backed Red I got him walking, trotting and steering and then had help from instructors who would get on him as well as teaching me on him or hack out with me so we could ride in a field. It worked really well for us.
I think you have got to rely on your gut feeling if you really like her - I certainly didn't set out to buy a newly backed four year old when Garnet looked over the fence and said 'Buy me' while I was trying an older horse, but she gave me 23 fabulous years.
Don't put yourself down by worrying that you won't do her justice - I used to feel this when I had my Anglo, Autumn. She won't care if she doesn't make it to the Olympics as long as she is loved and cared for. Best of luck! |
| joanna_piana |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 12:31:59 PM
Hi Arabian
I bought Ishara unbroken and sent her to Alethea to be backed who did a fab job. Of course then having them home and riding them can be a challenge and sometimes I have wondered what I was thinking! For me the key is having people to help and someone sensible to hack out with. One mistake I made was just hacking Ishara out rather than keeping up the schooling but each horse is different and actually it probably doesn't matter that much just means we are a bit behind on the schooling side. She had some time with a dressage trainer this summer and I now make sure I have a lesson every week and find that helps massively. Also I think confidence is incredibly important with a youngster, it's amazing how they take everything in their stride when they've got faith in you but will feed off any wobbles you may have. Good luck in whatever you decide I'm a great believer in listening to you gut instinct |
| arabian |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 11:52:48 AM
yes we do sound like peas in a pod its not so much that im worrying about sending her away as i have a rather nice lady in mind who is very local to me its more the worry about when she comes home and i have to continue the good work put in place oooooooo errrrrrrrr talk yourself into it talk yourself out of it lol i think due to having had some very bad luck i do tend to be a bit pessamistic on things not going right but you cant control the future can you and im scared i may end up missing out on so much through fear of things going wrong ( they are working on a cure for me as we speak lol ) |
| Honeyb060674 |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 11:31:50 AM
Doubting Thomas! You sound like I did (and occasionally still do) I bought Sunny as a rising 3yo. Before I even went to see him & asked my YO, who's known me for 20 years "Can I do this!?" I'm in the same frame of mind as you are, seen too many horses ruined by lack of exp or just down right stupidity. I don't want to be one of those people!
What kind of support network do you have if you did buy her? I lucky in that I'm surrounded by a wealth of experienced & very kind people on my yard, who have helped me out on a couple of 'issues!'
The groundwork is the best part, it's the perfect opportunity to 'gel' That's why I'm not rushing into getting him started under saddle..I'm rather enjoying this stage
Lots of AL folk have done it themselves, under a multitude of conditions, no doubt they're going to share with you 
Would it be such a bad thing if she were sent away for starting? There are some fantastic arab people, and I'm sure you could be pointed in the right direction.
Positive Mental Attitude...whatever your decision!!!
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| arabian |
Posted - 31 Oct 2010 : 11:11:04 AM
it is very frustrating but i really dont want to rush in and make a decision i may regret i have been offered a rising four year old who was just the type i love and could turn out to be everything im looking for as she has been really well handled has a very sweet temperament and has a very wise head on young shoulders i have had experience with having youngsters so im not worried about her being so young in that sense and i feel i can do a lot of the groundwork necessary leading up to her being backed however im not experienced in the backing side of things at all and know that i couldnt do this part which is such a huge stage to get right.... i have had sleepless nights thinking about this mare as i know that in my position she would have to go to a professional person for her backing etc and then its not just the backing and initial schooling its when i get her home and have to continue the journey am i capable of doing so????? never having done this stage before i feel its a huge thing to think about yet some of my friends say im making too big a deal out of worrying about it???? I contacted the lady and told her about my concerns and have said i dont think i can do her justice but cant get this mare out of my head  so i thought i would ask you guys if youve ever been in a similar situation or how you got on carrying on the early stages of riding?part of me feels like im letting her go and i shouldnt be as i feel so drawn to her but a part of me says youve never done this before and you could ruin her so best not to try........  |
| jaj |
Posted - 26 Oct 2010 : 11:22:12 PM
Just read your thread and wanted to wish you all the best with your search, I'm sure that the right horse will come along but it is very frustrating looking and waiting isn't it.
Keep us posted ! |
| z1mba |
Posted - 26 Oct 2010 : 11:08:28 PM
Hi Arabian
how awful what someone did to your boy xx he was lucky to find you xx
I lost my boy in February 3 yrs ago having owned him for 16 yrs he reached the grand age of 32
I still miss him terribly and still can't find another nearly 4 yrs later I'm still hoping that maybe I day I will find my next equine companion, I really wish u well on finding yours.
Becky x |
| jo78 |
Posted - 23 Oct 2010 : 7:23:58 PM
Just seen your advert is now live! Goodluck..keep us informed! |
| joanna_piana |
Posted - 22 Oct 2010 : 1:01:55 PM
I agree they find you. After I lost my beloved mare I was lucky enough to purchase her half sister and I knew she was meant for me before I even saw her and once I saw her there was no doubt I didn't look at any other horse. The same thing happened with Beau, i've always had a hankering for a gelding and no sooner did the thought pop into my head when someone told me about him. Again I got that "feeling" without even seeing him in the flesh, made the long trip to Wales and that was that. Unfortunately he is lame having injured himself jumping off the lorry and will be out of work all winter but I still think it was meant to be so no regrets. Good luck I hope your search doesn't take too long and you find your new soul mate |
| arabian |
Posted - 22 Oct 2010 : 11:52:47 AM
hi shah thats one thing i wont do is rush in and regret later i am very patient and never make a decision until im sure which my friends find really frustrating but it is such an important decision and i would happily wait until the right one comes along and if it doesnt then it wasnt meant to be .... im so very sorry reading your post you sound like youve had such an upsetting time i only wish i could help you .... thankyou for your reply i really appreciate it.... i hope things work out for you soon shah x |
| shah |
Posted - 22 Oct 2010 : 11:11:44 AM
Whatever you do, don't rush the decision. After 9 months of looking last year I bought what I thought would be my dream horse. It's turned out to be the worst decision of my life, I've suffered hugely as a result and it's not over yet. Please please please please take your time and have patience. The right horse will turn up one day.  |
| arabian |
Posted - 21 Oct 2010 : 10:23:46 PM
thanks nikki im so glad you found your boy i will certainly update this thread when i do too incasha i rushed over to your thread and have to say he is a beauty well done and congrats |
| Incasha |
Posted - 21 Oct 2010 : 10:11:25 PM
Dont give up, you will find your new best friend! I have waited over two years after losing my very special boy, and I pick my foal up on Sunday!! I hope the start of many many years of friendship! I never thougt I would ever be able to find another never mnd buy a baby, but you never know what is around the corner!! Keep looking!
I have just posted pics of min in the nervos, excited thread! |
